Torture

Losing weight has not been going too well. In fact I think I am putting on more pounds. I actually went up on the scales due the fact that I found in my closet a whole box of ding dongs that was left over from Christmas! Yeah! They are great and a freebie since they have to be eaten before they get stale! So by next week all of the goodies in this house should be gone and I can start depriving myself of everything sugary and tasty. I don't know how I will survive at work. It is so boring, but that is a whole other story.
The bad thing that happened today was I went and had a mammogram. Not a pleasant thought for a Friday afternoon. I walk into the office with a fair amount a trepidation. Then I get called to go change in the dressing room and was given one of those awful hospital dressing gowns that was huge! I put the thing on and couldn't see how it was going to stay on since the tie were too short and the arm holes were humongous. So I threw it on and waddle out to the waiting room where I am faced with five other ladies also dressed in the same ugly gown. What is so wrong with this picture? Has no one gotten it yet? We fearfully wait to be torture by sadistic nurses who will gleefully smash our boobs while wearing these ugly, prison style gowns? Has no one thought of getting something silky, and pretty? Hey, it wouldn't cost a load of money for this Breast Center to get some from J.C. Penney's or Kohls! I would even bring something from home that face these terrible gowns. Isn't it enough that my femininity is being attacked by a machine that is suppose to help me, but hurts like hell. Oh, during the torture it hurt so bad my fingers on my left hand shook and my lower lip quivered. Anyway, the whole point of this is it would help ladies get through this awful but necessary procedure is there was a hint of something frilly and feminine. Even little bed jackets or a camisole that tied in the front would be great. I bet the French go about these procedures in a more feminine and humanistic manner. I tell you this, I am bringing my own gown next time and the torture nurses will probably have a fit!
I think I will act like I am French next time and they will let me where anything I want to as I walk in to the torture chamber!

On the Scales

I got on the scales this morning. I was just too tired last night and I knew it would be very bad. It was bad this morning, but bearable. I weighed 135.2 lbs. That isn't too bad, however, I am short, 5'1", so any additional weight shows on me. If i was this weight and 5'6" I would look great. Oh, I wish I was taller! Last year I lost 12lbs. It was hard. I want to do it again. I feel so much better and can fit into my clothes without undoing the top button. the chocolate silk pie didn't help last night. At least it is all gone so I won't be tempted tonight! I do feel a cookie with a cup of coffee is calling my name.

Getting Started

I am not really getting started. I am just thinking about getting started. I love eating and enjoy all kinds of foods so the thought of limiting myself to healthy foods is awful!! How do people do it? I will have to go through detox from all the sugar I love to eat and that will not be fun. I am not a vegetable and fruit eater so I will have to make some major changes to my eating habits. The reason for wanting to lose weight is to fit in my summer clothes. I packed on the weight this winter and enjoyed every minute of it! It has been a very cold winter and depressing. Need-less-to-say, I am an emotional eater. Hopefully, my ego will be bigger than my emotional needs and I can get on track to lose weight. I will actually go on the scales tonight and see where I am and how much I need to lose. Oh, maybe the hard truth of the scales will spurn me on to the realm of dieting!!!